The Preacher performed a wedding on New Year’s Eve. I tagged along, right down the luminary-lined walkway into a fairyland of twinkling lights and joyful people. Not knowing anyone, I simply observed.
As he always does, Rick began the ceremony with a joke about a little girl named Susie who rushed home from school one day, all excited.
“Mommy, Teacher read us a fairy story about a princess named Snow White,” she began, and launched into the tale. When she reached the part where the Prince kisses Snow White awake, Susie looked up at her mother. “And then... well, YOU guess what happened, Mommy!”
Her mother thought a moment, pretending to ponder. “Well, Honey. I think they lived happily ever after!”
Susie frowned. “NO, Mommy! They GOT MARRIED!”
Everyone laughed, realizing that as children often do, Susy had nabbed the truth. Getting married and living happily ever after don’t necessarily go together – even when the hall looks like a perfect fairyland, and the wedding costs a perfect bundle.
In the department of human romance, too many of us fall for the myth that refuses to die: Two people perfectly in love plus one perfect wedding equals a perfect marriage.
I’ve noticed something. Couples who expect a perfect marriage usually need counselling before their first anniversary. Most don’t seek it – and all too soon, the fairy tale’s over.
The Preacher and I have four granddaughters. As it has almost every other little girl today, the media-driven Perfect-Princess obsession has affected them too. It irks me. I remind them that if and when they marry, they’ll need to choose a groom with other things to do than charge about on a white horse adoring them and collecting things that make them happy.
I remind them that, among other things, real men often make messes and snore and burp and wear dirty work-clothes – and so do real women. That true love means giving more than taking. It means loving in spite of imperfections. Remaining faithful. Forgiving hurts over and over and over and over...
Of course they’re far too young to grasp that. But they’re not too young to learn another story. The story of the only perfect romance. A Divine Romance between the only perfect pair in the Universe.
So many of our beloved wedding traditions reflect that romance: the relationship between Jesus Christ – Prince of Peace, Lord of the Universe and his Bride. She is not one person, but the vast collection of men and women and children through the ages and throughout the world. People of God who have believed in him, loved, trusted and followed him. People who together are symbolically dressed in a flawless white robe spun of forgiven sins and holy expectation. One Body called the Church, waiting, hoping, for her Groom’s return. For the celebration to begin.
Greater than the Princess cult, the Divine Romance is a story is worth telling our children and grandchildren. It’s even more worth living - right into the “happily ever after.”
