Sitting at an elementary school play, I was shocked to hear someone behind me loudly mutter ‘finally’ as the students came on stage for their final bow.
While there were mic problems, forgotten lines, and jokes that were not all that funny, the students wrote and worked very hard to perform the play. They learned about teamwork, gained self-confidence, and everyone in the audience could tell they had fun doing it.
No matter what technical problems there were, overall it was a delight to see the work they had done.
‘Tis the season for year end plays and concerts while final sporting events happen throughout the year.
When I was in school, there was very rarely a time when a parent could not make a performance or game.
Since the majority of dads are farmers, many of them made sure the work was done so they could get out of the field in time.
Since I am going to more and more of these events, I understand what my parents went through in the 23 years of having kids in school.
But I still hate hearing this ‘finally’ sentiments.
We should be encouraging students to try these things, no matter how much they may fail at first.
I have fond memories and lifelong friends from spending 7 years making music. I gained so much from every drama production and variety show I was in and there is hardly one of these performances my parents missed.
I may not have picked up my clarinet in 12 years but I gained so much from joining the band and I kept going because I, like lots of the students, were well supported by parents who came to every concert, drove us to practices, helped up fundraise, and chaperoned on field trips.
This does not include the amazing teachers and coaches who stuck with us through the junior level years where there were tonnes of skills we needed to work on.
Some kids may have needed more encouragement than others and I have always heard kids lament over their terrible solos or track results.
Even though I was encouraged by teachers and family, as a person who now writes for a living, I do not think a single piece of elementary and high school writing survived my ‘everything I have ever written is terrible’ phase.
That does not mean that the encouragement I did receive was pointless.
As someone who now writes for a living, I survived that phase and kept my passion for writing intact.
Taking drawing lessons from Grant McConnell, I discussed with him my own frustrations with self-criticism.
His response was perfect: you do not start at the end.
Simple words yet the most profound.
Kids will not be perfect at playing an instrument or sport right away but with our help they can get better.
Encourage a child and they will get better. Discourage a child and they will quit on the spot.
