Humour provides amusement and provokes laughter. The word is derived from the ancient Greeks, who believed that the balance of fluids in the human body, known as humours (the Latin word “humor” means "body fluid"), controlled human health and emotion. Hence the saying, “laughter is the best medicine.”
Sven was having his annual medical appointment, and the doctor took one look at his big stomach and refused to believe that he works out. So, Sven listed the exercises he does every day: jump to conclusions, climb the walls, drag his heels, push his luck, run out of time, chase the dollar, run around in circles, put his foot in his mouth, go over the edge, and beat around the bush!
When I first heard the expression “black humour,” I thought it to be discriminatory and wondered if there was such a thing as “white humour.” But then it was explained to me.
“Oh doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation,” Lena said.
The doctor said, “Don't worry. It’s my first one too!”
People of all ages and cultures respond to humour. Most people are able to experience humour, be amused, smile or laugh at something funny and thus are considered to have a sense of humour.
Sven was attending an antiques auction in Toronto. Donald Trump went up to the auctioneer and had him announce that he had lost his wallet containing $10,000 in cash, and would give a cash reward of $500 to whoever found it. From the top of the bleachers Sven shouted, “I’ll give a $1,000 cash reward!”
For a person, finding something humorous depends on a host of variables, including geographical location, culture, maturity, level of education, intelligence and context.
Ethnic humour is prevalent in our society, as are blonde jokes.
Ole moved in next door to an Asian couple. The wife’s name was Chin Tu Fat. She was a plastic surgeon, and her husband was a psychiatrist named Sum Ting Wong.
Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
A more sophisticated form of humour is satire which requires an understanding of its social meaning and context, and therefore tends to appeal to the more mature audience.
Karl was sitting at a sidewalk café in Vancouver, enjoying the sight of all the sailboats moored at False Creek. The waitress came to take his order and he said, “I’d like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.”
The waitress looked Karl over and said, “I’m sorry sir, but we are out of cream. How about with no milk?”
But then there are always people who lack a sense of humour, and that might just be the police officer who pulled Sven over for speeding.
“Do you know how fast you were going?” asked the officer.
“Hey!” said Sven, “If you don’t know, then why the heck did you pull me over?”The officer handed him the ticket and without smiling told Sven to have a nice day.
Humour is most often provided by telling a joke, and a joke is defined as something that someone says to cause amusement, merriment or laughter.
When I first came to Canada, I learned that most people called their toilet “the john.” I thought if we can give our toilets a man’s name, I’ll call mine the Jim. That way I can say that I go to the Jim first thing every morning!
Ole’s son Per had finally earned his master’s degree in sociology, and upon graduation his professor, who had also written a text book used as course material, asked him which book had helped him the most and made him able to graduate. “My father’s cheque book!” answered Per.
Good humour and funny jokes make people laugh. There are many ways of laughing, such as roaring with laughter. It’s similar to guffawing and is usually accompanied with slapping one’s thighs. Chuckling, chortling, giggling, tittering and twittering are more controlled ways to laugh; however, wry smiles and cackling are more sinister expressions.
Here are a few stories in an attempt to produce that laughter.
A police officer attempted to stop Sven for speeding but Sven gradually increased his speed until he was topping 160 kilometres per hour. Sven, however, eventually realized he couldn’t escape and finally pulled over. The officer approached the car and said, "It's been a long day and my shift is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behaviour, I'll let you go."
Sven thought for a few seconds and then said, "My wife ran away with a police officer about a week ago. I thought you might be that officer trying to bring her back!"
A bank robber pulled out a gun, pointed it at the teller, and said, "Give me all the money or you're geography!"
Puzzled, the teller replied, "Did you mean to say 'or you're history?'"
The robber said, "Don't change the subject!"
Ole went to his lawyer and told him, "Karl my neighbour owes me $500 but he won’t pay up. What should I do?"
"Do you have any proof that Karl owes you the money?" asked the lawyer.
"Nope," replied Ole.
"OK, then write him a letter asking him for the $5,000 he owes you," said the lawyer.
"But it's only $500," replied Ole.
"Precisely. That’s what he will reply and then you’ll have your proof!"
Sven phoned Hans and said, "Holy crap, I just fell off a 50-foot ladder."
Hans said, "Oh my God, are you okay?"
"Yeah, said Sven, “It's a good thing I fell off the first rung!"
