Not all marketing strategies are created equal.
The undying truth of that statement was hammered home while I was watching TV on a recent afternoon. On came one of those ubiquitous CFL commercials, the ones where a player is profiled - in this case, we learned about Travis Lulay of the BC Lions. The spot opens with great shots of Lulay doing what he does - playing football.
Then things go off the rails.
"He's real," we hear the narrator say. "Loves the great outdoors." We then see Lulay fly fishing in a river while wearing a Lions hat.
"Always looking to land the big catch," is another great line because Lulay fishes and is a quarterback who needs people to catch balls for him!
The only way this commercial could be more cliché and Canadian is if a Mountie was standing on the banks of the river, staring stoically out at a beaver dam.
In another of these allegedly promotional spots we learn that Chad Owens, star wide receiver for the Toronto Argonauts, is from Hawaii and likes to surf.
"He's from Hawaii, playing in the Great White North," the narrator says over shots of Owens paddling in the Hawaiian surf.
"He's not just good, he's real good," is another gem from the Owens commercial.
The visuals are hokey enough, but it's the ridiculous narration that transforms these spots from boilerplate advertising to outright disaster.
That brings us to the coup de grace, the cherry on this rather bland sundae - the tagline.
"You need to see these guys play."
That's it. Not quite "Just do it", is it?
There are apparently 12 of these commercials, designed to promote the CFL on TSN. Thankfully I've only seen a handful of them.
"You need to see these guys play is all about giving fans an up-close-and-personal look at the most dynamic players in the CFL," TSN creative director Kieron Mullarkey said back in June. "We're excited to reintroduce fans to these 12 CFL stars - both as real people with a range of passion, and of course, as incredible athletes."
When you read about the idea as Mullarkey (who came up with this malarkey) described it, it doesn't sound so bad. Of course, the devil's in the details, or in this case, the execution.
I'm no marketing expert, but I have a hard time believing "You need to see these guys play" was the best slogan TSN could come up with. Why, exactly, do I need to see these guys play? So I can think about the delicious parallels between Travis Lulay fishing for bites and fishing for receptions? So I can tell my friends as we watch the game, "Hey, did you know Chad Owens is from Hawaii and he likes to surf? Imagine that!"
I'm really not trying to beat up on the CFL here, but these commercials just struck me as so typically CFL/Canadian.
They're boring, uninventive and with just plain lame.
You need to see these guys play? Maybe, but not because of those ads.
Rider Updates:
After dropping a 25-13 decision to the Blue Bombers, the Roughriders sit at 8-2. I'm hoping my column from last week (in which I wondered whether this year's Rider team could be the best ever) doesn't serve as a jinx for the rest of the season.
