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What did I tell you? I know my baseball

It's too early to comment on the NHL playoffs so let's try the age old formula for a column crammed with "I told you so stories" about up and coming MLB stars and maybe it is time to stick a fork in the Jays because it's not even May and they're as c
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It's too early to comment on the NHL playoffs so let's try the age old formula for a column crammed with "I told you so stories" about up and coming MLB stars and maybe it is time to stick a fork in the Jays because it's not even May and they're as cooked as the BBQ ribs I had for supper last night.

Aroldis Chapman - I cry myself to sleep every night thinking of why the Yanks let this Cuban stud slip away? During an April 18 game he was clocked at 106mph (unofficially) on the radar gun. What we have here folks is a guy that should have a cape on. He's the Usain Bolt of baseball. He is so dominant that even a foul tip is a national sports story.

Rich Harden/Scott Kazmir - both of these injury-riddled chuckers are showing the exact form that I predicted. Sore arms, no velocity and a couple of careers teetering on the brink of doom

Andrew McCutcheon - The Pirates' outfielder is beginning to figure things out at the plate and his power is finally rounding out his skill set. He can fly on the bases and in the outfield. As a cranky old father - I can even let him get away with that haircut. I tried the dreadlocks look but it just alerted the RCMP that I was back on the cider.

Joey Votto - baseball's Italian Stallion is tearing the cover off the ball and while his power numbers are slow out of the gate, his smooth stroke will invariably put the Canadian in position for another run at the MVP.

Kyle Drabek - the Jay's rookieis consistently missing bats with what us baseball junkies call plus stuff. We'll see how he makes out against the AL East amidst all the accolades. I'm betting he'll be the staff ace by seasons end. 15 wins aren't out of the question.

Colby Rasmus - the deadly leftie swing is carrying the Cardinals as everybody waits patiently for Pujols to explode. He'll be a .300 average, 30 home runs, 100 RBI guy for the next ten years.

Clayton Kershaw - I told you guys that you're watching the second coming of Sandy Koufax. Kershaw is among a small list of pitchers who are a very real threat to toss a no-hitter on any given start.

Jose Tabata - The Yanks GM should be strung up for letting this kid get away. Blazing speed and a power stroke to match his chiseled 220-pound frame. He is a legit 30/30 guy for years to come.

Some surprises

After a very pedestrian stop with the Yanks last fall, it looked as if Lance Berkman had lost his mojo. His move back to the NL is a terrific story and though his career is in a slow fade, it appears he'll go out in style.

I recall mentioning that Carl Crawford's contract was a joke and it seems that his slow start is another example of the horrible pressure he must be under whenever he cashes his pay cheque. I know the feeling.

Boston fans can relax. The team is just warming up, and by August their slow start will be long forgotten.

My personal heralding of the one and only Phil Hughes is making me look human. The hard throwing Yankee is struggling to hit 90mph and I am implored to explain the reasons why velocity comes and goes faster than wives and girlfriends: injuries, mechanics, poor off-season conditioning, age or simply reality.

The idea that a prize athlete does not suffer through the same traumas as a regular Joe is to suggest that a massive salary solves all of life's little woes.

Once again I speak these words of wisdom from years of living the high-life.

The expectations that come from my ridiculous earnings keep me awake some nights and even though I'll likely land in the Journalism Hall of Fame - the depression that comes with having to wear stretch waist jeans and watching my hair turn grey reminds me things like infidelity or a family death happens in all walks of life. No one is immune to fate and personal tragedy.

As you sprinkle your Prozac on your oatmeal this morning try to remember that even pro athletes are not invulnerable to the challenges of everyday life and that things can always be worse. You could be a Jays' fan and that is a burden I would not wish on my worst enemy.