The unfortunate hazing incident in Lanigan has inspired much talk and debate these past couple of weeks or so.
And what it seems to boil down to is a big, fat rock and a hard place.
For the parents, and the "freshies."
Let's take the parents for instance.
If you're a good parent, your natural instinct is to protect your kid from hurt feelings, embarrassment and especially violence.
So when your kid comes home in tears or fiery anger over something that happened to him, of course, as a parent, the initial knee-jerk reaction is to do something about it, guns ablazing.
A question some people have been pondering, however, is if the parents of the Lanigan hazing victims did the right thing by contacting the police.
Now, the specific details of the initiation event are still hazy and it's not completely clear yet who contacted who, but it can be assumed that when the RCMP say that "five victims came forward", surely a parent was involved at some point.
I mean, five 14-15 year-olds, in that period of your life where fitting in and people's opinion of you is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING ON THE PLANET SINCE THE DISCOVERY OF FIRE
So yes, put $200 down on red that at least one parent was involved.
Some people might read this and wonder why in God's name we're even exercising the notion that the parents should have refrained from seeking the police's help in the matter, for the sake of their kid's reputation.
"They were doing their job! Those senior students deserve punishment!"
Of course they do; if the charges are correct, then they definitely crossed the line and deserve a stiff punishment.
But in the grand scheme of things, who is, unfortunately, going to suffer more?
Is it going to be the 11 male youth charged with assault who, knowing the Canadian judicial system, will probably get a slap on the wrist and a few hours of community service, maybe a fine their parents can pay off.
Or, is it going to be the hapless victims, whose names will not be released to the public but you can sure bet that everyone in Lanigan and all the youths in this vicinity, through the pubescent grape vine, know who they are.
And let's face it folks, kids are mean. Especially when they're self-conscious, unsure of themselves, walking on eggshells trying to be cool, trying their hardest not to be labeled a "loser", "nerd" or "douchebag" (that's a new one that seems to have ousted the 20th century "pointdexter").
So, you can best believe that the victims who went to the police are going to get teased. To what lengths, who knows, but knowing high school and what a roshambo that is to be in the in-crowd, it won't be just one person letting the victim have it. There will be a bunch of followers, like lemmings, jumping into the thick of it all.
And it's awful. Horrible. Why should the victim suffer at all? Hasn't he already paid enough? But the fact is that sometimes, as bizarre as it is, the theoretical "right decision" isn't the right decision. Unless the right decision is setting your kid up for an entire school year of bullying, mean text messages, taunting on Facebook and sneers in the hallway.
Obviously it wasn't their intention as parents. But with bullying, not hazing, being the bigger, more serious problem in the teenage realm of high school, that's what they should be concerned about. Bullying in the social media age is much more vindictive, constant and all-consuming.
And the "freshies".
Well, if they didn't go to the hazing party, they would have felt left out and probably would have been made to feel that way as well.
And if they do go, there's a good chance they'll have to do embarrassing things they really want to avoid.
What a serious pickle.
Those parents and freshies; they're damned if they do and damned if they don't.
CM
