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The Monarchy of Mom

Recent political events have brought to the forefront of my cerebral cortex all the thoughts of the political process, the democratic rule, the platforms of party campaigns, and yet, for all the commotion and excitement, I remain slightly re-gruntled


Recent political events have brought to the forefront of my cerebral cortex all the thoughts of the political process, the democratic rule, the platforms of party campaigns, and yet, for all the commotion and excitement, I remain slightly re-gruntled (def: disgruntled politically again) with the concept in which we try to accomplish democratic will.


In the home of Momma bear, democracy be damned!


Our dictatorship has one leader who oversees opinions as they are developed, delivered, discussed, disputed, discarded, and the word of the Monarchy of Mom is final. While on occasion I have staged a political coup-de-ta to oust Momma bear from the throne of power, it has finally occurred to me that her stubbornness knows no bounds. To that end, realizing I shall never hold the Ring of Power, I have found a safe haven in this dictatorship. I have become the Militia of Mom and exact her will upon the citizens of our country.


While various citizens occasionally rise in protest of homework, house and/or yard chores, friend visiting privileges, or other minute matters of state, uprisings are met with swift and immediate action such as the removal of all TV privileges and clear cut dismissal of all rights and privileges (?grounding? as we like to call it), with the most extreme cases being met with a full Saturday of chopping hundreds of pieces of firewood to help the citizens of Mom realize the error of their ways.


The Monarchy of Mom is not without heart though and on numerous occasions there have been reports of treats from a store, friends visiting for a weekend, or a weekend spent at a favourite fishing hole. There are flaws in the system, most notably, the Militia of Mom being well-known for being ?bought off? with promises of hugs, puppy dog eyes, or especially sugar filled treats. While these transgressions have not gone unnoticed by the all seeing leader, thankfully to date the militia has not been replaced.


In the real world our political system does not work so clearly at times but it fulfills the freedoms we enjoy. Whether programs are created, revamped, rehashed, thrown out, renewed or presented for the first time, the necessary set of skills required to accomplish any program lies in the hands of the good people of the bureaucracy who run our government.


A tip of the hat to those skilled employees of government for all their hard work.


You do a fine job even when you have to change your flag and point of view every four years, election pending. I can?t imagine the amount of time and effort that has to go into the creation of a program that you may be asked to throw out in four years.


To the vast majority of us, the political election is nothing more than poor TV ads, 30 days of evening news about political leaders with too much hair gel and signs on every corner that become the focus of urban artisans and their spray-bomb art kit. I am pleased to say I will exercise my God given right to vote, but many people will not vote at all. This is not a plea to you non-voters to go out and vote in the election; don?t worry, I?ll vote for you and let you know how it turns out!


So as I report from the Nation of Hill-Billy Heaven, I leave the politics to the politicians, but as far as common sense goes maybe I can offer this to all of our would-be political leaders.


Little Jacque, Jack-Boy, Steevee, Mikee, and all the candidates of each riding . . . I know darn well you all lived in a Monarchy of Mom at some point, and thinking of that as your guide, would Mom approve of what you?re doing right now? Or would you be swinging the axe at the wood pile? Keep that thought in mind when you are looking for my vote.