Speaking with Chrystene Ells and Rowan Pantel last week about her experience in a couple Saskatchewan seniors homes, nothing she said was new.
She talked with people who have been lonely and depressed.
People who receive little in the way of emotional care or intellectual stimulation.
People who are confused and scared and frustrated by their circumstances.
Like Pantel and Ells said, it is not because of lack of dedication from the staff. It is a lack of funding to provide the level of care that is needed.
There was little Pantel and Ells could do after their funding ran out to continue the level of interaction they were providing with the Hello In There/Hello Out There program.
These are amazing stories that Pantel and Ells took the time to discover from just ordinary Saskatchewan people.
These are stories of trappers and phone operators and other ways of life that have disappeared.
Men and women who survived the most harrowing times of the last century; the dirty 30s and two world wars.
Women who could no long remember their husbands names but could remember how happy they were.
These are stories that need to be told, not just for our sake but also for the sake of the storytellers.
Ells says a lot of good came out of the program.
Residents who were on anti-depressants no longer needed pills. One resident who hadn’t said a word in years actually interacted with fellow residents.
This program provided them an escape back to times when they were happy, if only for a little while each week.
Unfortunately, in a lot of cases, this loss of interaction and lonely is also caused in part by family members not providing that care to their relative.
Ells heard firsthand about family members never coming to visit or, in one sad case, the family putting the gentleman in the facility without his knowledge or input.
At the time he was talking to Ells, he didn’t even know what happened to his belongs or his house.
Ells saw in a lot of cases that it wasn’t until after the person was gone that the family realized how lonely and depressed they were.
You know where else I’ve heard the same kind of stories? People who abandon dogs at the SPCA.
I spoke to Ells about how she felt working with seniors, especially ones that were not visited by family.
Just listening to these stories, some going so far as to sound like elder neglect, even I was angered by the situation.
I asked Ells if she felt angry at the families and she said no, she just wished that families would take the time to listen to their seniors and hear how frustrated they are or how lonely they are.
I realize that there is only so much we can do to care for our seniors but by the stories that Ells told, it sounded like there was much more that could be done.
Sometimes going in to visit a family member is a thankless job. Sometimes you will not see the good you are doing. Sometimes you will question the good that it does.
But these are people who need support and love, even after they cannot remember who you are.
Also remember that we will get to this point in our lives, too. Is this how we’d like to be treated or do we want things to change?
