UNITY — Don’t Ever Call Me Mother; Homeless in My Own Home, by Helen Martin, is a remarkable book. It chronicles her childhood, in particular, the years of abuse and neglect she suffered at the hands of her stepmother.
Martin can tell her story in the voice of the child she was. She puts the reader in that child’s shoes; for example, not only when she is starving and not allowed food, but also when she finds joy in finding leaves of different colours on the way to school.
Her amazing and ultimately triumphant story, together with the rich descriptive language used to tell that story, landed her on the FriesenPress Bookstore bestseller list the first week of June.
After her shipment of books arrived, with the help of friend Ellie Leidl, Martin set up and held two book signings in Unity. Declaring she would have been thrilled if she had sold even one or two copies of her book, Martin was amazed – and grateful – when she had to shut down her second event early, due to being sold out of books.
Since then, Don’t Ever Call Me Mother has also been chosen as a staff pick at FriesenPress and will be a featured title in their online bookstore, in the staff picks section.
Martin was surprised and touched at how many people came out to her first signing, at Rise + Grind June 29, including people she hadn’t seen “in years.” Word must have spread, because, at her second signing, at Ma & Me Bakery July 4, she had to slip out earlier than planned when she ran out of both hard and soft cover copies of her book.
Before the second signing event, one person shared on social media, “I couldn’t put it down,” and another referred to “an absolutely amazing story.”
In speaking to Martin afterwards, she said she was “in shock, complete shock at the support I received from the community.” She described the turnout as “overwhelming,” extending a heartfelt thank you to everyone.
Martin was not one of those authors who always wanted to write a book. Instead, she simply wanted to explain her traumatic childhood to her only child, daughter Michelle.
When Michelle Martin-Atwood read her mother’s story last summer, she set the wheels in motion for its eventual publication early this summer.
Reluctant at first, insisting she was “not a writer,” Martin came to realize her experiences and the way she overcame them to become a positive person as an adult might be of help to other survivors of childhood abuse. With a diploma in psychiatric nursing, Martin also hopes Don’t Ever Call Me Mother will be of value to professionals in the mental health field who work with survivors.
In addition, writing and publishing the book allowed her to share many old country Ukrainian traditions, traditions which, as she says in her foreword, “brought meaning and joy into my life.”
She also wanted to recognize the people who helped her during that difficult time in her life, and hopefully encourage others today not to turn their backs on children who may be abused or neglected.
Regarding all the details from decades ago, which she is still able to fully describe, she said, “To be a survivor, you really had to pay attention.” She shared she learned early in life it was important to be very observant so that she could read signs of potential danger.
Those observations and her recollections now allow her readers to share her childhood, to be confused when her dog disappears, to be afraid when the stepmother loses her temper, to smile when straw-stack sliding.
Martin said, “I really had to work hard to put myself back into that child.” There were no music playlists; she needed absolute silence every time she sat down to write.
She is grateful for the support she received from Michelle and her husband Wayne throughout the whole process of writing (which took many years) and publication. Helen and Wayne met as school classmates after she was rescued from her stepmother’s home, and the couple will have been married 56 years later this month. They have lived in Unity for over 50 years.
For those interested in obtaining a copy of Don’t Ever Call Me Mother, Martin is expecting a new shipment of books for local sales in early August. In the meantime, the book can also be ordered at books.friesenpress.com/store, as well as through Indigo, Barnes & Noble and Amazon. The ebook version is available on Kindle, Nook, Apple Books, Google Play and Kobo.
