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Column: Christmas might be tough, but we can make it better

Do you feel festive or stressed ahead of Christmas? An opinion piece on how holiday season may feel.
holiday-depression

When I think of winter holidays, I think family and friends, laughs, bright warm colours and twinkle lights; the tree and beautiful balls, some old and some new, but each with a story; miracles and gifts; music that takes me back to childhood and makes me want to hug someone; aromatic mulled wine and yummy hot chocolate; and interesting dishes and meals that have been known and comforting throughout my entire life. 

When I think Christmas and especially New Year’s (it still remains a bigger holiday for me), I think happiness.

Has the picture always turned out the way I described? Of course not.

My first holiday season in Canada, I felt really lonesome. My family and friends were across the ocean, and that first year I missed them the most. I celebrated with them online, but because of the nine-hour time difference (they are ahead of us), by 4 p.m. we were done. Some of them went on to party, others went to bed. And I was sitting on my own by the tree with my laptop and felt completely miserable.

One year, when my brother and I were still kids, there happened to be a full-fledged family-wide fight. So instead of getting all together with the rest of the relatives, our parents ended up taking us to the cabin for the New Year. It didn't feel cozy or festive inside, there was no tree or decorations, and we didn't have time to catch up. It also felt like the North Pole outside. Of course, we were still together as a family, but that New Year's Eve definitely was very different.

One year my hubby and I were coming back from a warm holiday on Christmas Eve. We were all happy, tanned and rested. His brother-in-law was supposed to pick us up from the airport, and we were planning on celebrating with his sister's family. But instead of having a sweet and cheerful night, we ended up spending most of it in the airport, as customs officers thought my hubby could have been a drug dealer, I assume, and went through every inch of his luggage.

There were other mishaps around Christmas time, but I still love the holiday season. However, it might feel very different for many people.

A lot of things may make holidays really stressful. The absence of loved ones, when others are having fun together, the extra expenses, which often don't fit the budget, the pain from losing someone, which may become even more pronounced around this time of the year.

The holiday season may have a negative effect on mood and mental health and contribute to the worsening of symptoms related to anxiety, depression and other mental health conditions.

Besides, we tend to think of holidays as a joyous time. But in reality, for many of us, it's the time when emotions heighten, and they are not always positive. The Canadian Psychological Association points out that our expectations from the holidays are often set extremely high, so it becomes even more stressful.

Besides, it almost guarantees that our vision for the season will be really hard or impossible to achieve, so we end up disappointed. (There is even a special term for it – holiday stress or holiday blues.)

But while holidays might not be as joyous for many people, there are many things and ways we could use to cheer others up. It doesn't matter if their holiday season is looking bright or grey, a kind gesture shouldn't hurt anyone. And there are a lot of people in Estevan and area who are providing great examples.

Mariah Erickson of Midale found a way to spread joy by sending hundreds of Christmas cards to strangers. The Estevan Road Runners Club came up with another fun idea: they will be doing a HoHoHoliday run by seniors’ homes to make residents and everyone else, who'd spot a bunch of fully-dressed running Santas, smile. St. Joseph's Hospital Foundation also made it a bit more special for the local seniors by organizing tea parties as a part of their Festival of Trees this year.

The Estevan Community Hamper Association and its Angel Tree, with great support from the community, do their best to take some financial stress off of people's shoulders during holidays.

There are many ways to cheer others up, show that there are people who care about them and their wellbeing, make it a bit brighter for them and remind others that there is a lot of good around. And I'm sure everyone who has a little bit of extra love, energy, positivity and care to give, can do something special for someone they do or don’t know to make sure that this holiday season is better for everyone.