If you're one of the more fortunate members of society, this is the time of year when people ask you want for Christmas. Even if you're not rolling in the dough, you want to know how to best give to your loved ones. Wish-lists abound and people are running around like headless chickens seeking just the right gifts for their friends, family and co-workers for whom they've been named Secret Santa. Though you can't go wrong with gift certificates, everybody appreciates a gift that has thought behind it.
Growing up in the 80s, I regularly cut apart my grandma's Sears Wish Book, creating a cut and paste poster of all the things I wanted to receive under the tree that year. I was quite specific and I usually got what I asked for! That was my youthful and innocent expression of a now perfectly-honed pragmatism in regard to gift-giving. I was never into the element of surprise and I even taught my younger cousins to sneak-a-peek so they'd know what they were getting long before Christmas day. I know, I was SO bad, but as a child I couldn't rest until I knew what I was getting!
Nowadays, I'm notorious for not being interested in the pre-holiday mania shopping. My family, in fact, used to wait until Boxing Day to do our real shopping. (Yes, Corner Gas once did an episode about a family who everybody thought was poor because they didn't exchange presents on Christmas morning, when really they were just too cheap to pay full price for what they wanted.) I'm not ashamed of my cheapness, because it frees up my funds for being generous where it really counts.
The pandering-with-gifts mentality creates spoiled brats in both the young and the not-so-young.
I am grateful to be surrounded by such practical people, who don't want wasteful gifts. Of course, since my son was born, we have had all kinds of wrapped-up gifts under the tree. But we still give considerately and not frivolously. I've also learned to cultivate a good attitude about surprises!
It is absolutely much better to give than to receive and it's a hundred times better to know that the gift can be used and enjoyed appropriately. What satisfaction is there for the giver or the recipient if a gift is purchased and given out of the mere drive for material exchange?
I fully make up for my cheapness by being wildly creative with my gifting. For years, I have hand-made most of the gifts I've given. Each year it's something different, from really, really awesome mixed CDs to original artwork (including hand-drawn cards), baked goods, raw chocolate and superfood treats, specially-processed trail mix, home-dried fruit, hand-blended spices, sprouting kits, essential oils blends, bath salts, recipe books, hand-decorated picture frames, photo albums and jewellery that I designed and made with my own hands. I like to give food away year-round, so I try to create holiday gifts that will last, because I know my treats sure don't! My five year old son paints pictures for everybody now without even being told. He just knows it's the time to start making the presents!
Of course, there are some who are so non-creative that they couldn't even assemble a basket of their recipients' favourite things! Thank goodness for prolific artisans!
Hand-made goods can be purchased at trade fairs and at the Farmers' Market every weekend for two months prior to Christmas and often local artists will also offer customized gifts. It seems to me that many people have realized that the point of the holidays is to show our appreciation of each other through the act of giving. Gifts that have meaning are growing in popularity. What a difference it makes to the vibe of the gift when it has been hand-made with love and also supports the local economy!
But when one does shop retail for gifts, thought is just as important, isn't it? Knowing your loved ones' likes and dislikes, including collections and tastes in music, books or toys is essential for creating a fulfilling experience. Maybe kids are posting their wish-lists on Facebook nowadays rather than on their Grandparents' refrigerators. Knowing what to buy is not about indulging material wishes, but about paying attention to what thrills and delights those around us.
If we stress about what to give, we miss out on the joy of giving! No matter what our preferences are, we must be sure to communicate them to those who buy for us. Why end up with Jazz when what you really wanted was Classical? And in this age of information and efficiency, if you can't find that wish list on their Facebook and you're not willing take the time to ask your loved ones what they truly need this season, you'd better be prepared to include a receipt.
