My favourite people are kind and unassuming. They're friendly, which means they always try to make others feel comfortable, whenever possible. It feels good to be around them, doesn't it?
Of course, not everybody always knows when others are uncomfortable, but considerate people will at least try to avoid making people feel bad. There are some people, of course, who would rather make others feel as uncomfortable as they do, in any given situation. You gotta love 'em.
Undoubtedly, we are all a work in progress. I have been on the dishing end of unfriendliness a few times, but I could tell far more stories about being on the receiving end of it! It's not fun! My cynical side thinks it's becoming more common, these days, to find unfriendly people behaving in inconsiderate ways.
Is it a big city mentality? Or is it a social hysteria? I don't care what caused it, but the only cure is personal responsibility. Each person has to realize that, eventually, we are accountable for everything we do, in some way or another - even the briefest encounters.
To paraphrase Mother Theresa, 'being friendly is often unappreciated. Be friendly anyway.' Even though it seems to be completely elusive in plenty of public situations, we have all been taught better behaviour than what we sometimes display to others in certain situations.
Recently, at a local store, I was treated as though I were unworthy of friendliness. After the cashier scanned my items without a 'hello', she told me my total without a 'please' and she gave me my change without a 'thank you' or even a 'have a good day'. That wasn't what bothered me, as much as the fact that the very next person who came up to the till, who happened to be an elderly lady, got the royal treatment.
All of a sudden, a person who I presumed to be socially hindered was displaying full capabilities in treating a customer like gold! I couldn't believe it. Maybe what I got was, in fact, the 'younger generation treatment'. The cashier was at least ten years younger than I am, so I suppose I should have taken this lack of courtesy as a compliment. But I wonder why would there be a difference in how we treat anybody, no matter how young or old they may be?
I'm so glad my husband's grandmother, who was his best friend in the whole world until she was lost to cancer many years ago, instilled in him simple chivalry. He holds open doors for me and others, and he always follows other customs expressly designed to show respect.
Kelt's ability to make eye contact and to say the appropriate social graces makes him a friendly person by anyone's account, but it would seem that, in this day and age, he is also a customer service genius!
Our family says hello to every baby we see. Perhaps it's because our son Artan, at nine weeks old, was facing outward in his sling at the grocery store and he said 'hi' to someone, which was kind of freaky. He was always such a friendly baby and he loved being at eye level, for socializing.
Being friendly should extend to strangers, but it's a courtesy most of us don't even extend to ourselves or our loved ones at times. Unless we make a point of being friendly, we risk missing out on opportunities to share a mutually-uplifting exchange.
Ask yourself how you can become friendlier. Could you start smiling at people more, even if you don't know them? Could you be more patient in traffic or in line ups? Perhaps you just need to treat your own children or spouse with more of the patience and kindness you exhibit in public.
I never liked the fake nice. I believe it's far more valuable to take the time, the younger the better, to cultivate genuinely nice attributes, like kindness, patience and humility.
A wise person once said that we should show kindness to strangers all of the time, because we never know when we might be 'entertaining angels unawares'. Indeed, we are each others' angels, even if we don't always go around wearing wings or a friendly monster costume.
