He said
For starters, the ban we are talking about is not about gifts to your kids or a spouse. We are tackling whether the obligation of Christmas gifts to barely seen friends has gotten out of control.
I don't give a lot of gifts so wasn't entirely sure this was a problem for people. I strictly gift exchange with people I am incredibly close to, and because of my family's dynamic, I don't even give to many people I shared a house with growing up. It's not because I don't care, but because we have a large family and decided that everybody draws a name and everybody gives one gift. I don't have to get something for my two brothers, sisters and parents, this year. I just have to get something for Mom. It's the luck of the draw.
I also have few friends who I gift exchange with, partly because I'm horrible at keeping in touch with people on a daily basis. If I don't work with you, I've probably forgotten about you, and we don't have an elaborate Secret Santa program at the Mercury.
One argument against obligatory gift giving is that Christmas gifts are expected to be honoured with a return gift. If you get something for me, I now have to get something for you. For people who give to everyone they know, they may be expecting to receive a lot of things in return. That may be their malicious end game.
I don't have many friends who give gifts to everyone they know, so I don't have to give something back to a bunch of people. The idea of giving a gift because it's what you like to do is a romantic one, but it may make others feel obliged to give something back. That is perhaps an unintended consequence of one's generosity.
Gift giving with people is something we can all talk about. Just ask your friend, "Are we exchanging gifts this year?"
She said
'Tis the season to be giving! And receiving! And spending!
Or is it?
After reading Martin Lewis' column in The Telegraph, I have to say I'm persuaded in favour of abandoning the cycle of gift-giving beyond immediate family.
My personal reason is that I'm terribly awkward and one of my least favourite things about Christmas is giving gifts to people I don't know very well. For example, everyone has at least one friend who they're close with, but who doesn't quite qualify as a best friend. Do you get that person a gift? Do you buy them a gift just in case they buy you one? Do you risk being the one without a gift to exchange?
I really enjoy giving gifts. I bought my first Christmas gift today for Kendelle and I'm excited to give it to her at Christmas. But we discussed how much we're spending on each other since we're both university students and she doesn't have an income and I'm bad with money. I like this blunt, upfront sort of spending.
Workplace gift giving is the absolute worst. I've always struggled to find appropriate gifts, especially for female co-workers. I don't know what it is, but I always sweat being the only one who stays inside the budget, who buys something obvious, who shops somewhere lame. Buying gifts for co-workers needs to be done away with.
I do like the idea of getting together as a workplace and donating money to charity. Take the money you would have spent on a bottle of over-priced lotion and give it to someone who needs it. In Regina, you can sponsor families who wouldn't get to enjoy a Christmas with tasty food and presents on Christmas morning without help. It makes sense to me to use money I'd be wasting to give joy and love, which is the true Christmas spirit, to people who'd otherwise be going without.
