Last week was prime for some reflection. Reflections are supposed to be quiet summations of all the things that have gone right in your world. But when I glance back at my adventures, they often end up as recollections of misadventures, and I sometimes wonder how I managed to stay alive or at least somewhat intact.
But if you've lived in Saskatchewan for a good portion of your life, you're bound to have experienced a bit of misadventure in one form or another.
I started chalking up the not-so-great experiences and started a list of not so wonderful memories. These would be my you know you're in trouble when moments.
So here is my list, dear diary based on personal moments that would have left me better off if I had simply missed them. But then I would have been bored, and we don't want that now do we?
For instance, you know you're in trouble when the DJ you've hired for a special occasion dedicates the first song of the night to himself.
You know you're in trouble when four inebriated friends show up to build you a frame for your waterbed. No need to provide further literary illustration.
You know you're in trouble when you check in at the Air Canada counter with a sister who has two fussy youngsters in tow, only to be informed that "we'll let you know as soon as we find a replacement plane."
You know you're in trouble when you hear on your car radio that all RCMP cruisers, snowplows and STC buses have been ordered off the southern highways and you're creeping along Highway 6 somewhere between Raymore and Regina.
You're in trouble when you hear the age-old refrain from a loving spouse, "but I thought you had the key!"
You know you're heading for hurt when your hockey buddies urge you to "try this here Jansen home brew, made fresh last Saturday."
You know you're in trouble when you set out from Lanigan, headed for Wynyard and find yourself buying a fresh tank of gas in Watson. No, it wasn't the home brew, it was convoluted highway construction detours in an era long before GPS.
You know you're in trouble when your roommate tells the visiting sweet young thing from the U.S perched. at your favourite table in the local lounge that "I'm a Playboy talent scout and this here guy is my on-site photographer." I'm lugging a camera so she buys it! At least for a while.
You know you're in trouble when your car stalls in the middle of the mainline tracks and your buddy, who works for the railroad says, "Crap, I hope the 8:15 is running late." The clock on the dashboard tells you it's 8:10. We found a new source of strength to divert disaster.
You know you're in trouble when you've painted the bedroom walls with the colour that was meant for the living room.
So you get the idea, dear diary. Now go ahead and make your own list.
