The NBA season is here, which means it is time to dust off the old column template and give you my breakdown of all (most) every NBA team in a sentence or so.
East
Indiana Pacers- One of my favorite teams in the league, but are doomed by playing in Indiana. As we saw last year when they lost to Miami, it is very hard to win in the NBA the old fashioned (right) way which means it will be another exit in the East playoffs.
Miami Heat- I still hate Chris Bosh and Miami is probably going to be in the Finals again. Simple as that. They have LeBron.
New York Knicks- Thanks for taking Andrea Bargnani from Toronto, no really thank you.
Brooklyn Nets- Adding Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett would have been a big move, if I was still in high school.
Cleveland Cavs- All Canadian frontcourt with Tristan Thompson and first overall draft pick Anthony Bennett, how can you not love typing that?
Washington Wizards- People saying the Wizards could make a playoff push this year are forgetting that they are talking about the Washington Wizards.
Boston Celtics- Blowing up the Rondo-Pierce-KG trio was inevitable after Ray Allen decided to give up being a man to play for the Miami Heat. Drafting Canadian Kelly Olynyk will keep them interesting when Rondo decides to sit out the entire year with his knee injury as Derrick Rose did.
Chicago Bulls- A superstar away from being better than the Heat, expect the Bulls to take a swing at a blockbuster trade.
Atlanta Hawks- Get about the same attendance as a high school basketball team some nights despite playing in a major US city, but always have a consistently entertaining playoff team.
Toronto Raptors- Heart says playoff run, memories tell me soul crushing second half collapse, brain settling on the eighth seed. Go Raptors.
West
Oklahoma City Thunder- Despite the whole "How dumb is it to move a business from Seattle to Oklahoma City" thing, the Thunder have the best homecourt and boast the best player in basketball not named LeBron in Kevin Durant who put up historic shooting percentage numbers last year. Still, they are going to continue to regret trading James Harden.
Houston Rockets- Went all in on James Harden and Jeremy Lin before bringing in Dwight Howard, dark horse to finish in the top three in the West.
LA Clippers- You can try to sell me on the Clippers every year, I will just remind you that they are the team that has to put up selfies to distract from the Lakers championship banners, speaking of which....
LA Lakers- Pundits are predicting a disaster of a season with Dwight Howard gone and Kobe out for potentially the first two months. I am going the other way and predicting an exciting, high scoring year for the Lakers with Howard leaving freeing up space on the floor.
San Antonio Spurs- Sadly, Tim Duncan's missed layup in Game Seven of the Finals will likely be the last time we see one of the most underrated runs for any franchise get the attention it deserves.
Golden State Warriors- Sexy pick to go to the Finals, if Steph Curry's ankles don't crumble in a million pieces I think they do it.
Dallas Mavericks- The guard combination of Jose Calderon and Monta Ellis would make a coach vomit from all of the bad defense, but this team is going to score a ton of baskets this season.
Memphis Grizzlies- Old school basketball team, throw the ball in the post every chance they get. Lack of outside shooting always gets them come the playoffs.
Minnesota Timberwolves- If you get the time to drive across the border this year, go watch a Twolves game. Best power forward in the league in Kevin Love and the electric passing of Ricky Rubio will give you a show that is worth every penny.
Sacramento Kings- One year Demarcus Cousins will finally realize his potential as a elite inside scorer/rebounder, the Kings just hope it is before his rookie contract expires.
New Orleans Pelicans- Make fun all you want, Pelicans still makes more sense than calling them the Hornets.
Finals Prediction: Heat over Warriors (Basketball Gods, please make me wrong.)
