Change can help with the healing process.
January brings new beginnings for all of us. Each year we have the opportunity to start anew. This January I accomplished a major project in our home. I started to house clean early and I also rearranged some of the furniture.
The Christmas tree needed to come down as well as all the other Christmas displays which we enjoyed over the Christmas season. I felt the room needed a good cleaning, so spring cleaning came early at our place and I got a new look in my home. I did some spot painting to brighten up the room.
For those of us who have experienced a family death, this may be an idea for you to consider. It may help you to re-arrange your bed room. Paint the room a different color, get a new bedspread, or purchase some new pictures to add beauty to your room. Ask your family or friends to help you move any heavy furniture so you do not get injured. I am sure they will help you with your request.
If it feels right to you, purchase a single bed after your spouse dies- anything that you can do to lessen the pain of your loss is worth doing. Follow your own heart on when and how, to make changes. Remember that YOU have the right to change things and you may change things a few times till you feel comfortable with the change.
You may be in the market to down size or purchase some new furniture. Some widows/widowers have told me that their loved one spent the last few weeks or months in the recliner and these images always seem to come back to them. Moving the furniture or purchasing a new recliner helped them deal with their memories of an ill and dying spouse.
Children often want to be most helpful after a parent dies. But we all know that the children have their own family and lives to live. So many times a widow/widower needs to make small decisions on their own. By doing this we slowly get back into living without our loved one.
Making small changes often help a great deal during the grieving process. You alone know how you are feeling and you can help yourself in the healing process by making some small changes in your life.
"We grieve, but when we know heaven is our future there is hope beyond our tears." (taken from Widows connection.com)
Margaret Anne Yost nursed for 35 years. Returning back to school I completed classes from the Red River College in the areas of Gerontology, Bereavement, Death and Dying. For twelve years I worked in bereavement support at a funeral home.
At present I am employed as an Interim Parish Worker at Good Shepherd Lutheran Church in Melville Sask. I also enjoy my role as homemaker, wife, mother and grandmother.
