Today it really feels like winter. We are experiencing a good old fashion Saskatchewan snow storm. The entire community has slowed down almost to a halt, and it's an unwelcome feeling as one is trying to drive from one location to another.
One might feel that our grief can be compared to this winter day- we feel frozen in the snow and ice. We are moving ahead very slowly; often spinning our tires and not making any headway.
Winter has put an end to growth, greenery, flowers and gardens. Winter put the earth to sleep. What lies under the snow is now unseen-it seems to lie motionless and dead. But we know even if the trees have lost their leaves, the tree is not dead- only changed. This same tree will again bring forth leaves in the spring and be full of life and color.
We in Saskatchewan also look forward to the four seasons of the year- perhaps as we become more mature we would enjoy a shorter winter, but I am sure we all can say Christmas just isn't the same without any snow or at least a few snowflakes in the ground.
This past week a lady told me that her grief is harsher than the worst winter storm. The winter storm she knew would end, but she did not see an end to her grief. She can even see an end to winter- but not end to her grief.
I have heard about many storms already this year in the USA and eastern Canada. I am sure that with those storms came fear, disbelief, many emotions and much grief. When one storm follows close after another, the emotions and grief is amplified. It takes longer to recover and to move on.
After the death of a loved one, grief allows us to take a rest from the busy world around us. We come to a halt, and we look around and see what is really important in life. We realize the importance of our faith, our family and friends, the church and our church family as well as the strong ties we have to our community.
I have read the book 'Winter Grief, Summer Grace' by James Miller many times. For me this book compares our grief to the four seasons of the year. Spring brings young shoots and new growth - just a child growing and springing forth with new shoots as they learn and grow. Then we have the summer when all is mature and in full bloom - just like the middle years of our life. Autumn appears and life slows down, bends over and slowly fades. Followed by winter when all appears dead, frozen, asleep and listless. With the onset of spring the cycle starts all over again and there is joy in each new leaf and each new flower.
When we experience the death of a loved one- we will have stormy winter days. But be assured, just as spring follows winter - joy will follow our sorrow.
I encourage you to look at your grief as a gift- allowing you emerge stronger, and with a sense of new knowledge that life has victory over death and death is not the end.
"Spring always will follow winter."
Margaret Anne Yost nursed for 35 years. Returning back to school I completed classes from the Red River College in the areas of Gerontology, Bereavement, Death and Dying. For twelve years I worked in bereavement support at a funeral home.
At present I am employed as an Interim Parish Worker at Good Shepherd Lutheran Church in Melville Sask. I also enjoy my role as homemaker and full time grandmother.
