A cancer diagnosis can hit like a ton of bricks.
And the journey after the diagnosis is indescribable.
Karen Siernachesky and Erika Berting are two ladies who have been on that journey and now the trials that come with it.
When Siernachesky heard of training being offered from the Canadian Cancer Society for running a support group, she was on the fence but had the opportunity to go receive the training.
Any donations made to CIBC’s Run for the Cure and or the Canadian Cancer Society, this is one aspect of providing support for those going through cancer treatments or their family and friends.
Siernachesky is now a trained facilitator for a cancer support group in Humboldt. This is a way for her to pay it forward for those who supported her during her own diagnosis.
“Those people were so supportive and gave me so much information to help me get through the next year and beyond...I’d like to assist others if they need that kind of assistance or support.”
Siernachesky was Berting’s support after she was diagnosed a short time after Siernachesky.
“When (Siernachesky) called me, giving back to others is really important so paying it forward is a big part of this.”
Siernachesky and Berting also have the support of longtime cancer survivor, Sheila Moormann.
For Moormann, she shares something important in common with Siernachesky and Berting.
“We’re linked,” she says. “I believe I’m allowed to live to provide hope. It’s paying it forward.”
Just because you are diagnosed with cancer does not mean a death sentence, says Siernachesky, and Moormann is a prime example of that.
“I never had chemo, it wasn’t developed yet. It was just in the planning stages. I’m learning a lot. It’s a huge learning tool for me to be able to talk to someone who’s gone through that...I can pass that on.”
Between Siernachesky, Berting, and Moormann, they have all had different experiences which is vital for the group, says Siernachesky.
Discussing treatment options and symptoms, shared experiences, either through there own experience or a friend’s experience can help spread valuable information for easing the journey. Even if it is just giving permission or easing anxiety when it comes to discussing pains with their doctors and nurses, that is important, too, says Siernachesky.
“Some people think, ‘okay, this is happening to me, I just have to suffer through it for the next three, four days.’ You don’t have to. That’s the whole part of this is sharing what we’ve experienced.”
Moormann was virtually alone during her cancer journey and did not talk about it for many years.
It is hard to reach out, she says, because you are facing life or death.
Being involved with people makes it easier to talk about cancer because many patients tend to internalize their struggles.
No one can really understand the physical and emotional things that a patient is going through, says Siernachesky. Not their family or friends, or even their spouses can truly understand.
With many patients, some of the emotional strain also comes with trying to be strong for the family.
“I felt I had to be strong for my kids, my husband, my mom...I didn’t want to worry anybody. So I didn’t feel like I could say, ‘I’m having a bad day today.’ or, ‘what if I die?’ I didn’t feel comfortable sharing that.”
A support group is a safe place to ask those questions, says Siernachesky, especially the group of women who helped her through breast cancer and discussed diagnosis and treatment as they happened.
You are not alone, says Siernachesky, there has been someone who has experienced it and maybe even has experienced it worse.
And while family and friends are there to offer the support they can, they will not know how, says Berting.
Even if patients go to the group as a way to comfortably admit that they are scared, that is still an important part of the group, says Siernachesky.
While the group could have tips or advice for making treatment go smoother or are available to help someone vent about what they’re going through, they are not doctors or social workers, says Siernachesky.
They cannot council you on how to help your family cope with the diagnosis, they could maybe connect you with a trained professional who could help in that regard.
“What other resources have other people used? Let’s share those resources. We are not the experts at everything,” says Siernachesky.
Going through a traumatic experience is beyond description but Siernachesky says that this was a way she knew people, other than her family, cared about her.
The Humboldt Cancer Support Group meets the fourth Tuesday of the month at the Humboldt and District Health Complex at 7 p.m., with the exceptions of December, July, and August.
