Any variety of different circumstances can leave individuals or families alone for Christmas, but the holidays are often the most difficult time for those who have recently lost a loved one. The sudden death of Daryl Spencer in March of 2003 inspired a new Christmas ritual for his wife and daughters. The Spencer family created the JAMS Family Christmas Day Dinner: a gathering opportunity for anyone who wants to create different memories, share in the festivities with other generations, or simply not be alone for Christmas.
Reinventing Christmas dinner doesn't mean their dearly departed is forgotten.
"We have a candle we light every year, on the table," said Sandy Spencer Johnson.
Jen, Ali, Mikki and Sandy have welcomed a new member into their family this year. Sandy's new husband Joel will join her in celebrating Christmas with the patrons of the JAMS Family Christmas Day Dinner, many of whom have become like family to Sandy and her girls after seven years of hosting the event.
Sandy Spencer Johnson and her family welcome anyone who would otherwise be spending Christmas Day alone this year to instead come to the JAMS Family Christmas Day Dinner. The dinner will be held on December 25 at 1:00 p.m. at the Knox Hall, located at 136 Second Street in Weyburn. Anyone wishing to reserve a place or would like to help set up for the meal, or make a donation to help cover the costs, can call 842-6994. Anyone needing a ride can call the same number. Though reservations will be accepted until December 24, early booking is appreciated. However, walk-ins and deliveries during the meal will also be accepted.
New volunteers are always welcome, but this year in particular, they are much-needed.
"This year our four key volunteers, who know how to do everything, aren't going to be there," said Spencer Johnson, explaining that they all just happen to be out of town this year. "And so far we've only had one phone call offering help."
Not affiliated with any religious denomination, the JAMS dinner is simply a community event with a fund-raiser each year going to a different charitable organization.
Though the meal is free of charge to anyone experiencing financial difficulties at this time of year, for those who are able, Spencer Johnson suggests a donation of eight dollars.
"It has nothing to do with your financial situation," said Spencer Johnson, adding that people from all walks of life are welcome to attend the dinner, because it's about a get-together and not a hand-out. In fact, those who are able to donate larger amounts often do so gladly because every patron enjoys the time shared with each other. Nonetheless, no individual or family is ever turned away.
Last year the JAMS dinner saw 110 people. This year, Spencer Johnson hopes to have an equally great turnout because the organization to receive the proceeds from this year's donations is one that she herself co-founded.
The Southeast Family Resource Center is a newly formed group of individuals working towards providing respite services for families in Southeast Saskatchewan who have children with special needs.
"For parents of kids with ADHD, FAS, who have no respite," said Spencer Johnson, who is an Intake Worker in Mental Health and Addictions Services for the Sun Country Health Region. She explained that parents with special-needs children in Weyburn may receive funds to pay for respite services, but there is currently no facility in town to accommodate assisting families with special care. Families must book a full year in advance with the Regina Residential Resource Centre's Respite Home, which provides temporary accommodations for individuals with intellectual disabilities.
"It's as simple as one hour to a week," said Spencer Johnson of her vision for the Weyburn facility.
Even siblings need respite services, as they are, after all, sharing their parents.
"Let's say you've got a nine-year-old who is ADHD and you have 14-year-old that's in hockey. You can't even go watch your 14-year-old play hockey since you can't take the other one with you because of the noise and confusion," said Spencer Johnson, as an example of why Weyburn truly needs such a Centre. "It's a vicious circle."
Spencer Johnson stated that the Southeast Family Resource Centre incorporated earlier this year. Though they have been busy putting together a respite registry for people who can go into homes to provide assistance, the ultimate plan is to have a respite centre based largely on Hope's Home in Regina. Funds raised will first go toward first having registrants covered by insurance and then to having the centre in place.
In order for the group to gather information from the community, a Needs Assessments must be completed so the Centre can be designed to suit the needs of the families in Weyburn. Anyone requesting information about this organization or would like to complete and submit a Needs Assessment form can call Sandy Spencer Johnson for details.
Spencer Johnson long-held a vision for the respite centre as well as for the one with whom she would spend her life.
After meeting Joel Johnson, Sandy was able to check each attribute off of her list, including the Toronto Maple Leafs jersey. They got married, just four months after meeting online, on February 18, 2011.
"He's incredible. He treats my children like his own," said Sandy Spencer Johnson. "There's no question that he's coming to this dinner, he'll be a social butterfly popping by every table."
