Gossiping seems to be a national pastime, even though gossiping is defined as "casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true," according to my computer's dictionary. Though of course I have contributed to gossip, it still bothers me the way we pry into other people's lives and spread things that may or may not be true about people as if it's the most important thing in the world.
I don't understand how we can be so concerned about what's going on in the lives of others, and have enough interest to broadcast it wherever we can. It seems like such a juvenile act, yet appears to be a hobby among many.
Intentional gossip with the intent to out the dirty deeds of someone is just wrong, and always with gossip the facts are distorted, or there may not be any facts involved at all. It could be, as it often is, a creation of a vindictive mind or a misinterpretation that spreads like wildfire. And these rumours have the ability to embarrass individuals and cause irreparable damage to a reputation. How often do we 'hear' things, and even if the target of the rumour denies it, we still carry that information with us.
That's the tough thing about rumours, how do you sort out the truth from the fiction? It's often an impossible task with one person's word against another. Many times we hear gossip, and it seems utterly insane, how could it possibly be true? Yet we continue to spread it anyways, maybe because we can't believe it, or maybe because it's the only interesting thing we've got to share, and that's an even worse predicament.
Are our lives so mundane and unexciting that we live for slandering others and sharing stories that aren't ours to share? Do we not have anything intelligent and educational or interesting or amusing to tell each other? Can we not discuss the protesters in Syria, or discuss our dreams and goals in life? Could we not even talk about our favourite things, or stories of things we've done rather than to go on and on with the tales of others? It seems absurd to me.
When someone adheres to social convention, or genuinely asks, 'what's new with you,' how often do we reply with 'not much, but have you heard about so-and-so . . ." That's not really new with us at all is it? It has nothing to do with us, and it may or may not be new with that person either. What right do we have to dispel other people's business?
I understand when people talk about people that have affected their lives personally, but that's not really gossip because you're sharing an experience that you were a part of and have witnessed. Unless you're a complete liar, there will be truth to that, and we all need to vent at some point. That's understandable. Relating what we don't know to be true as if it were fact is not understandable.
Have you ever been the subject of untrue gossip? I have. And it is tough to deal with, because no matter how often you deny the charges and know in your heart they are untrue, it's often a difficult if not impossible task to convince the masses of your innocence. Though it's often said that as long as you know what's true, that's good enough, but none of us want to bear the judgement, treatment, and humiliation of a false accusation. Like I mentioned earlier, it can have the ability to forever taint your reputation and alter the way people view you.
Some gossip is unintentional; someone may spread what he or she has heard out of disbelief and in an attempt to gather facts or confirmation. Yet, we still must be careful of what we say because that can put us in a bad spot. We may speak with good intentions or curiosity, but that can easily be warped to make us out to be the malicious gossipmongers. I've been in this position before where my curiosity has made me seem like a contributor of the rumour, so I often try to think about what I'm saying and how it will affect others before I say it.
I often try to focus on the things in my life, and not the things in others. I'm doing my thing, and people are doing their thing, we should respect that. We're all here trying to live our lives; we shouldn't try to make it any harder for each other. There is a world of conversation outside of gossip, and I find if I stick to my own concerns, the outcome is quite an enjoyable one.
