Step 1: Peyton Manning becomes a free agent.
Step 2: He signs with an AFC team, Denver Broncos
Step 3: His Broncos win the AFC championship
Step 4: His brother Eli's New York Giants win the NFC championship
Step 5: The Manning brothers meet in the Super Bowl at New Orleans Feb. 3, 2013.
Don't you just love it when a plan works out?
When Peyton was freed from his Indianapolis Colts obligations last March after a spectacular 13-year career in the Midwest, every NFL general manager without a Hall of Fame quarterback under contract drooled like a starving man at a Keg Restaurant just thinking about signing the cerebral QB with the rifle arm who will go down in history as one of the best ever at his position. But general managers running NFC teams didn't have a chance because Peyton was similarly drooling about the possibility of a Manning vs. Manning Super Bowl. And that meant AFC teams only.
And as the plan unfolds, it could happen this year. Eli's Giants, who won the Super Bowl last February, are back among the NFL's elite. And Peyton's Broncos, after a middling start, are playing like the powerhouse most people expected them to be. Peyton's 35-point second half explosion against San Diego on a Monday Night Football game Oct. 15 turned a 24-0 halftime deficit into a comfortable victory and solidified his stature as one of the game's best.
Jim Trotter on si.com said Peyton's performance that night was "a personal highlight reel, outrageous even by his standards."
"You never can count that guy out," said Brandon Stokley of the Washington Post. "I've seen it too many times. Everybody in this locker room knows, and we all believe that when you have him behind the centre, we can come back from any deficit."
Peyton Manning hasn't failed at much during his career. Why would his Manning-versus-Manning Super Bowl dream be any different?
Comedy writer Jim Barach: "NBA rookie Royce White of the Houston Rockets is battling severe anxiety. His biggest fear is that he will spend his whole career with the Houston Rockets."
Greg Cote of The Miami Herald, on the proposed Bikini Basketball Association: "If teams in that league have a merchandise sale and the signs read, "All our clothing 75 per cent off" - they mean it."
Comedy writer Alan Ray, on the NHL lockout: "Hockey fans are facing a grim reality. They may have to spend the entire season sober."
Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times: "Patriots tight end Michael Hoomanawanui returned to practice after sitting out a day because of concussion symptoms. Talk about cruel and unusual: Doctors wouldn't clear him until he could spell his last name."
Vancouver blogger Steve Burgess: "Lance Armstrong said to be in negotiations to swap seven Tour de France titles for one Nobel Prize in Chemistry."
Steve Harvey, in his weekly Bottom Ten: "Coach Andy Reid of Philadelphia, saddled with the most turnover-prone quarterback in the NFL (Michael Vick), took the logical step and fired his defensive co-ordinator."
Barach again: "Alex Rodriguez was benched for Game 1 of the series between the Yankees and Tigers and was seen flirting with women in the crowd from the bench. Coaches weren't worried. They know A-Rod always has trouble scoring in the playoffs."
R.J. Currie of sportsdeke.com: Five signs Winnipeg pivot Buck Pierce isn't over his concussion: 5. Loves the play-by-play of Rod Black; 4. Is studying Tim Tebow's throwing motion; 3. Thinks an option play is asking out Buzz instead of Boomer; 2. Practises in a watermelon helmet; 1. Says the NHL lockout is a shame because it's the Leafs' year.
Another one from Perry: "Location, location, location can be a bad thing, too, as evidenced by the sponsor logo on the seat of UK diver Tom Daley's swim briefs: British Gas."
Auburn alum Charles Barkley, to Birmingham's WJOX Radio, on the 1-5 Tigers' football game against Vanderbilt: "Trust me, we're playing the smart kids this week. If you can't beat the smart kids, you're in for a long year."
Twin Cities sportswriter Larry Fitzgerald Sr., to the St. Paul Pioneer Press, on son Larry Jr.'s $128.5 million contract with the Arizona Cardinals: "He's doing pretty well - I keep trying to get him to bump my allowance."
Comedian Argus Hamilton, on reports that Judge Judy makes $45 million a year: "Only Alex Rodriguez is paid more to sit on the bench."
Another one from Cote, on the Jets' choice of Mark Sanchez or Tim Tebow at quarterback: "(It's) like you wanting a safer neighbourhood and having to decide between Beirut or Fallujah."
Ian Hamilton of the Regina Leader-Post, after noting that convicted dogfighter Michael Vick was once again a dog-owner: "The way Vick has been fumbling the ball this season, the animal had better be a retriever."
Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, after a dog stole Paul Casey's ball as he was lining up a putt: "If you think this a problem in golf, you should see the world Frisbee championships."
Care to comment? E-mail brucepenton2003@yahoo.ca
