Mother's Day is coming up, and I now have a good reason to fret over it.
It's something I've never done before. I'm not the kind of person who worries about these special days. Christmas never stresses me out. I just read a story, however, about how mothers secretly hate their mother's day gifts.
Mine is already in the mail. In fact, it arrived earlier this week and now there is no turning back. I thought it would be fine. I know my mother pretty well. When I think about it, she would totally lie right to me and say my gift was as special as my rich brother's. OK, I don't have a rich brother to compete with, but she would do it anyway.
Just last weekend I was talking to my mom and told her the gift's in the mail and should be arriving soon. I told her all about the gift she can expect in the mail, all proud that I remembered enough in advance to actually get her something more than an e-card.
Her response was, "You don't have to get me anything."
After becoming paranoid and self-gift-conscious from reading this article, I'm pretty sure how to decipher that mom code: "Your gifts are nothing to me, and neither are you."
In this article, it also said that on average, Canadians will be spending more than $84 on their mothers. If most mothers secretly dislike their $80 gifts, my $30 gift will probably end up being used as a really thick coaster or a paperweight.
I also confess that while I spent $30, $8 of those were spent on shipping and handling. That's right, almost one-third of my mother's gift is shipping.
Maybe I should just stop reading the news. I hate to say it as a reporter myself, but the news is just making me paranoid and cynical.
Now when my mother tells me she really likes the gift I gave her, we'll have this conversation where we're both saying one thing and thinking the opposite. I'll say something like, "I'm glad you like it," but will be thinking, "Stop lying to me."
I always thought there was some reward for just remembering Mother's Day, like remembering her birthday. The thought is more important than the gift itself, isn't it?
My sister decided to not give Mom a gift this year. She just finished a year in school, making little money and already had four years of student debts to pay down. She'll probably get her a card, and they'll have brunch or something. That's probably better than my gift, but I put some thought into it.
It's a very similar whats-a-doodle to what I got her last year, and she told me she really liked. Now I know better. She was just giving me the mom-party line.
Just know that I try really hard for this Mom. Happy Mother's Day.
