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Sunbelt Americans make mark in WHL

The statisticians' calculators were clacking away and the numbers showing up were mind-boggling.

The statisticians' calculators were clacking away and the numbers showing up were mind-boggling. Emerson Etem of the Medicine Hat Tigers was coming off a three-goal game against Victoria Royals in early October and after five games of the 72-game schedule, was on pace for a 144-goal season in the Western Hockey League.

Considering the all-time one-season record in the 45-year-old league is 108 (by Brandon's Ray Ferraro, in 1983-84), 144 goals would be Gretzky-like in eclipsing an old mark.

OK, so the 19-year-old Etem, a Long Beach, Calif. native, will almost certainly not score 144 goals this year. What he is likely to do, however, is lead the WHL in goals this season and confirm his status as one of Anaheim Ducks' most prized prospects.

Etem will also go down in WHL annals as the best Californian to ever play in the league . . . so far. But watch out, the Americans are coming.

The WHL even has the son of a rock star in its midst. Liam Stewart of Hermosa Beach, Calif., whose parents are Rod Stewart and Rachel Hunter, is on the roster of the Spokane Chiefs.

In 1988, when Gretzky was traded to the L.A.Kings, sociologists said that a hockey boom would surely follow in the land of the sun and surf. It has; 23 years after that pivotal hockey event, there are no fewer than 19 players on WHL rosters listing either California, Texas or Arizona as their places of birth.

Stories of backyard rinks and 6 o'clock Saturday morning practices at 30-below temperatures are foreign to these American skaters, but tales of learning the game at shopping mall ice palaces and rollerskating rinks are legion.

So while the likes of Seattle forward Colin Jacobs of Coppell, Texas, Kamloops forward Chase Souto of Yorba Linda, California, Kelowna defenceman Colten Martin of Arlington, Texas, Victoria forward Austin Carroll of Scottsdale, Arizona and forward Taylor Crunk of San Jacinto, California bring their hockey skills to WHL rinks this winter, thousands of other southwest American youngsters are no longer looking up to icons like Gretzky for their hockey inspiration, but to players like Etem, who have proven that a warm-weather climate is no barrier to becoming a hockey star.

Budd Bailey of the Buffalo News, after a man delivering Chinese food to Falcons kicker Matt Bryant was charged with stealing Bryant's golf clubs from his garage: "Seems like he confused 'delivery' with 'takeout.' "

Cam Hutchinson of the Saskatoon Express, after a study revealed that people tend to yawn more in the winter than they do in the summer: "In a related story, the Toronto Maple Leafs play in the winter."

RJ Currie of sportsdeke.com: "TSN said Riders quarterback Darian Durant was questionable for Thanksgiving. Hasn't he been questionable all year?

Dwight Perry in the Seattle Times, after Tiger Woods had a run-in with a fan at the Frys.com open: "Just wondering: Do golf rules consider thrown hot dogs a loose obstruction or simply a wurst-case scenario?"

Headline at TheOnion.com: "Lone post on Jaguars fan message board requests directions to stadium."

From Perry's column: "Tigers slugger Victor Martinez, to the Detroit Free Press, channeling his inner Yogi Berra after tweaking his side: 'The only way I won't play tomorrow is if I wake up and I'm dead.' "

Steve Harvey of The Bottom Ten, after a personal-foul penalty helped drop Indianapolis to 0-5: "How can a horse-collar penalty be called against a Colt?"

Another one from Perry: "Commissioner David Stern cancelled the first two weeks of the NBA regular season as labour talks remained at a standstill. Negotiators vowed to really start trying, however, once they reach the season's final two minutes."

Janice Hough of Leftcoastsportsbabe.com, with a sure sign of the apocalypse: "The best professional team in Michigan plays football, and the best professional team in Texas plays baseball."

Comedy writer Argus Hamilton, on beleaguered Tiger Woods finally landing a new endorsement, with Rolex: "He lost Gatorade, Gillette, AT&T, Accenture, and don't even ask about his deal with Fidelity."

Headline at SportsPickle.com: "Vancouver successfully goes riot-free despite season-opening loss."

Norman Chad of the Washington Post, on Twitter: "Frankly, the only sideline reporters I respect are those at the Running of the Bulls."

Reader Dick Borzych of Mequon, Wis., asking a question of Chad: "Does the Lingerie Football League have a fantasy league, or would that be redundant?"

Janice Hough, of leftcoastsportsbabe.com: "A rough week for New York sports fans. The Yankees were eliminated. And the Jets and the Giants both lost. On a more cheerful note, it looks like the Knicks' season may be cancelled."

Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun: "It's about time Edmonton got its downtown arena. Now all it needs is a downtown."